Mittwoch, 17. Juni 2009

So the weekend

was awesome and all but the emotional fall-out from all the drinking and non-sleeping and general CAROUSING was on a truly terrifying scale. You know that feeling when you just know for absolute certain that NOTHING WILL EVER BE OKAY EVER AGAIN. Well yes, that times about a hundred.

But of course everything is okay again, for various reasons:

1) We are listening to Rod Stweart. Yes, Roddy ma boy, I do like your body and I think you're sexy. Your version of Ruby Tuesday, on the other hand, is fucking horrific.

2) My cousin Emily is coming tonight. And then my dad, my sister and my brother are coming on Friday. Hurrah!!

3) After days, nay weeks, of truly fucking shocking weather Berlin has finally pulled its socks up and produced some lovely sunshine. No more tramping about in your flatmate's effective but terribly unsexy raincoat in torrential rain trying to buy cotton wool before you go and teach 8 six-year-olds about "winter clothes" (this is how ridiculous my life is, yes).

4) Sunshine = White Russians. Hurrah!

Life is good again.

Freitag, 12. Juni 2009


Well, almost. Two classes left to teach but they two of my favourites. In fact, all the kids this week have been awesome. Not counting Monday's. But I rarely count Mondays. Particularly if Monday starts on two hours sleep and a hangover.

But back to this WEEKEND. Tonight has turned into one of those nights where there's just not enough time to go to everything you want to. I am being forced to choose between a birthday party, another potentially brilliant night at the top of a film studio (at least I think that's what it is) near Sonnenallee, a 90s party in Xberg featuring LIVE HAIRCUTS by Becky and the Exberliner relaunch party. And it's not even properly the evening time yet, so God knows what more revelry will be added to this plethora. I feel vaguely hungover just thinking about it. Jesus, talking about hangovers, last Saturday was possibly a Top Five Of All Time. Not pretty, not pretty at all. Couldn't even look at my Potato Smiles until about 9pm.

As for tomorrow, tomorrow promises to be an event of biblical proportions (referring to its potential to wreak havoc, not any religious affiliations. Unless you count gin as a form of religion, which I probably do). Not only is it WORLD GIN DAY but it is LENA'S BIRTHDAY PARTY. Ich freue mich.

All this raises of course the question of what the devil to wear? Luckily, I was handsomely kitted out last Friday at the lovely Bea's swap shop evening (my first ever, and man, it was SO MUCH FUN) so my options are considerably expanded. Which is a damn good thing indeed as the looks I am sporting most frequently are two of my least favourite, namely Primary School Teacher and Colourblind Transsexual. Particularly tragic when really what I want to look like is this, ALL OF THIS:

Donnerstag, 4. Juni 2009

Things that depressed me today:

Doing lots of lovely shopping, including buying ingredients to try to replicate haircutting, cakebringing Becky's brownies of joy, only to have my card refused at the desk. Depressing and also sehr sehr peinlich.

Reading my online bank statement.

Being berated (even worse as she was smiling and gushing throughout, but a berating it was) by one of the kids I teach's mother for "always talking too loudly in the class". Show me someone who can keep a group of crazed six year olds occupied for an hour in a small room full of toys that they're not supposed to play with whilst trying to interest them in learning English without raising their voice occaisionally and I will show you someone who uses valium as a teaching aid.

I think this is actually all there was. I feel much better now. Catharsis and all that jazz, I guess. Huzzah.

Mittwoch, 3. Juni 2009

I have a lot of errands to run today.

And none that I'm particularly looking forward to. Apart from two: picking up a parcel that the lovely Sarah (my teaching-the-world-to-sing/shut-the-hell-up-for-two-bloody-seconds mentor) has sent me which I think is full of stuff to bribe kids with, and shopping for Jessie and Lena's birthday presents. Apart from these fun and possibly cake related activities (as in they require some walking, and therefore SUSTENANCE. Nothing so sustenancing as cake) I have to:

Go to my office to leave in my invoice for last month. This involves a lot of INTERFACING with GERMANS IN SUITS, not my most favourite activity ever. And pretty light on the cake front.

Send off a letter to the Student Loans Company detailing just how little money I earn and thus convincing them not to try to take it all away from me. This will involve writing a serious Dear Sir type letter which I am considering hand writing on a bit of old file paper, as I can't be arsed with/afford the printing off of a typed one. This will only help my argument I feel.

Fill out a German tax form.

Go to goddamned Spandau to teach for 45mins. I travel for FOUR TIMES THAT to get there and back. I fail to see how this is normal.

And goddammn it all to hell I have to go there NOW.

Dienstag, 2. Juni 2009

(More) (cheap) things that make me happy I am in Berlin:

There is a man here who does cookie treasure hunts. He hand delivers your winnings. Unfortunately he is apparently already married, but is opening a shop soon. In the absence of free love I am prepared to pay for (cookie) love. Check it out.

Burgeramt (clever, eh?) on Boxhagener Platz. Amazing burgers and good, generous portions of properly cooked chips. For about a fiver, if even. I had the chicken burger with Erdnusssauce. Odd, but delicious. Lena went for chicken guacamole which had big strips of fresh mango in it. She said it was yummy yummy.

The fact that you meet so many awesome people here. I mean, this goes for everywhere, apart from maybe prison or the House of Commons, but it seems to be doubly true here. In the past week/end alone I met a girl who edits a photography magazine (and owns a brilliant black jumpsuit), another who cuts hair, bakes cakes AND events manages at places like Glastonbury, and yet another who has taken three months off teaching sculpture to three year olds (how, how, HOW?! Mine can barely colour in a house...) to travel around Europe. Wowee.

The fact that you can buy eight mini ciabatta rolls in a bag for like 75c. I still get excited everytime I take a warm broetchen from the oven. If anyone knows of anything better than bread straight from the oven do let me know.

I don't know what was going on here:

But I liked it.